Friday, October 21, 2011

At Work... Alone

No one is here. I'm sitting at my desk trying really hard to stay busy. Linda, my boss, and the afternoon student secretary, Megan, are both out. The counselors that have offices in the main office are gone. Larry, head honcho, is here, but he keeps walking in and out of the office. I'm so bored..............

Anywho, being left to my thoughts leads to either genius ideas or a list of things that annoy me. Today, unfortunately, the latter has happened. I just read an article in the Daily Universe about hipsters. I don't know why, but my blood boils when I hear that word. My blood boils when I see people who try really hard to be described as that word. If you consider yourself a hipster, stop reading now. If you consider yourself a hipster and don't mind being offend, keep reading.

Basically the whole thought of a hipster makes me sick in my stomach. How are those people able to function in society normally? Oh wait, they don't. In my opinion, it seems that all they care about is how to NOT fit into society. I once read this quote that made me giggle:

"I'm just trying to be different, like everyone else."

I've always been amazed at how one sentence could expose people like hipsters so thoroughly. So many people try so hard to be like hipsters... and I don't understand why. Why would you want to wear thick rimmed glasses when you don't have to? You look like a retard. If you google "hipster", most of the images that come up have people with those stupid glasses. Newsflash: YOU DON'T LOOK INTELLIGENT.
douche bag example #1

 And maybe the "intelligent" aspect of the glasses isn't what they're looking for. Maybe they WANT to look like huge douche bags. If that's the case, congrats, you win.

Another thing that bothers me is a hipster's obsessive nature with listening to bands that no one knows about. I'll admit, my late years of High School and early years of College were filled with band seeking. It wasn't till after I got over that, that I realized how exhausting it was. And honestly, most of those bands sound the same. It's all the same nasty noise (they come out with gems every now and again). I usually got a headache from listening to all that crap which then got so bad that Britney Spears started to sound like the Tabernacle choir in comparison. I feel like the only reason hipsters do that is to feel like they have physical evidence of their "hipsterness". I hope they know, most people do not honestly give a rats butt about how they know 50 obscure, awful bands.

Finally, the things that irritates me the most (I think mainly because I work in the Honor Code Office) is a hipster's obsession with hair. They need to have it, and they need to have a lot of it. It seems like the hairy you are, the greater claim you have to the title "hipster". Let me make a point:

VERY handsome and clean shaven

pure YUCK

You know, sometimes I feel bad for hipsters. They spend their entire existence working so hard to be different with no obvious advantages. Women hipsters have to compete not only with other girls, but with guys to see who has the tighter jean/legging. Men hipsters probably spend their entire day wondering if their private parts will ever grow back. I'm not really sure how to handle this increasingly annoying problem... maybe the following:

                                  1. Ignore them (they only exists to get attention)
                         2. Kill them

The first might lead to less criminal charges, but the second would be very satisfying.


  1. lol! I also wrote a post about hipsters... it's a bit different though. But funny I promise-- check it out and leave some hate:


  2. hahahaha i love you so much and agree with all the above. KILL THEM.